OKC Kayak Word Soup

Alright, alright, I confess. I am a bad listener. Those who know me best will tell you that if I start to get that glazed over look on my face, you better ask me to repeat what you just told me as confirmation that I understood what was being said. More than a time or two, people have assured me that they informed me of something, and I, at the time, nodded in agreement, yet later the entire conversation seems completely foreign to me.

I could offer up many an excuse, such as a poor memory, Attention Deficit Disorder, or more. The scapegoat I will use instead is the fact that most of the time, I am running around like a chicken that is about ready to lose his head. Simply put, this time of year we lead a hectic, busy life. This said, sometimes I am guilty of rushing a conversation or being impatient simply because there is a call on hold, three customers in the kayak shop, and another caller beeping in on the other phone line. Sometimes, there simply is not enough hours in the day to take time out to hear about some off topic, random event.

Kids tend to be the worst about interjecting these unrelated tidbits from their personal life. The kindest way I have found to gently hint to folks that the comments are straying from where the conversation needs to be focused (such as the kayak lesson at hand, etc.) is to repeat a line from the movie Jerry Maguire. For those of you who have never seen this, or may have forgotten, one evening Jerry and this precocial, little kid of about 4 years old are bantering back and forth about various sports related records, facts and figures. Suddenly the kid exclaims, “My neighbor has bunny rabbits! Yes, completely random, I know. I regularly repeat this oddball line when I am being subjected to a litany of conversation that is either way off topic, or is of absolutely no interest to me whatsoever.

Here of late, many of my friends have been throwing this line back in my face. Point taken. I am the king of long winded, somewhat useless stories and random nature facts and figures. My favorite reply which was recently offered up to my, “…neighbor has bunny rabbits” phrase was, “So does my playboy!” For the first time in a long time, this kayak guide was at a loss for words (but grinning!)

Not that the conversations I may have yet to partake in with you would ever warrant this, but if I ever were to tell you, “My neighbor has bunny rabbits,” or, “The human head weighs eight pounds,” I am only teasing, but you will catch my drift!

Oh, and by the way, did you know that Cardinals use the bark of grapevine to line their nests?

Let’s face it folks, advertising ‘aint cheap! The reality is that it is a necessary evil though. We like to brag on the fact that most of our business comes from referrals our happy customers provide, but we occassionaly do spend some of our hard earned bucks on this stuff. So, when a friend of mine recently queried as to why OKC Kayak was not sponsoring him in the annual Redbud Run, I was open to listen to his proposal. He put what we considered to be an inexpensive advertising offer on the table, and we bit the hook. His generous offer was basically this, we pay his $25 entrance fee and he wears a lifejacket during the race with our business name on it. Being the fair individuals we are (and humble too!!!), we actually offered more than what he was asking for. I antied up $50 bucks to which my buddy eagerly replied, “For fifty, I will wear the lifejacket and a kayak helmet during the entire race.” YES SSIRRR!!!! Now we are talking. This event is huge, drawing tens of thousands of participants and spectators. If Jason was willing to draw a lot of attention to OKC Kayak by dressing ridiculously and embarrassing himself, we were game.

Now, the final negotiations of this transaction did not wrap up until eleven in the evening, but buddy, let me tell you, I was out the door and on my way to do some costume shopping even though the hour was late. Two hours later, I had an overflowing shopping cart full of all sorts of arts and crafts products. Giant foam letters, ropes of wire garland with flashy gold stars, iron on T-shirt designs, and much, much more, all made the cut. One hundred dollars later, I was on my way home to spray adhesive, tape, and tack these crafty nick nacks all over a lifejacket and kayak helmet. I had this garb decorated out with some serious bling bling by the time I was done.

At the stroke of noon the next day, I delivered the outfit to our little marathon man. It was all I could do to not laugh, as I envisioned him running down the road wearing what had turned into some sort of nerdy, not so superhero outfit. He was not pleased at all, apparently feeling taken advantage of by the fact that I may have gone a little overboard in my decorations. I almost expected him to back out of our little agreement, so I asked that he bring photographic proof that he wore it, before he would get paid.  He grumble, visibly  upset, but agreeing that he would keep his word.

The day of the race arrived, and sadly, I was tied up with another event and unable to watch it firsthand.  Jason, however did deliver his photographic documentation, and the bounty was paid.  Now, he did actually tone down my crafty additions to the jacket and helmet, but I guess this is a small price to pay for his continued friendship.  Even Amber, his wife, used the iron on transfers to make a cute T-shirt that she wore.

All this for fifty bucks?  Now who is believing we are not in a recession?

The Discover Oklahoma, OKC Kayak episode will air on CBS on Saturday, July 12th. This starts at 6:30 p.m. Autograph signing will begin Sunday at 8 a.m.  Ha!

Consider this a certified public service announcement from OKC KAYAK. Hey, why not??? Plenty of folks have been giving us a free plug lately. Plus, it kinda makes me feel like Bob Barker or something.

Here is the deal, I am from a LAAAAAARGE dysfunctional Catholic family. ….so big, we actually grew up in a giant shoe. I have five sisters and 2 brothers, each of us as individual and unique as can be. (but, of course, I am the smartest and best looking out of all of us. That is why I run a kayak shop. Ha!) Anyway, I am forwarding an email from number 3 (it is easier than trying to remember all my siblings names).

Nancy, my second oldest sister, has her heart in the right place (sadly, it is her brain that is a little mispositioned — Kidding Nance!). She is sharp as a tac (a tic tac), and over the years, has been fortunate enough to have tricked many a big business into paying her an obscenely large salary ($6.15 an hour at the quickie mart).

Recently during a round of downsizing in the telecommunications world she traded in the big bucks as well as the rollover minutes and took a job doing something that really fit her mission in life. Kudos to her for not only following her heart, but doing something nice for the world in the process. She went to work for a nonprofit spay and neuter clinic that allows low cost pet surgeries for low income families. (I told you that fake resume would eventually catch up with you, Nancy!) So, if your housecat needs a teet reduction on the cheap…. Nah, not those kind of surgeries!

Anyway, I myself don’t particularly care for cats, (hence the reason I am passing along the email about getting them fixed… Again, I am kidding Nancy!) but am so impressed by what she does that I am passing this along. She did not ask me to do so (otherwise I surely would have refused!!!) The real reason I am forwarding this is to prove that I am actually normal compared to the rest of my sibling, not to mention to build some good karma for that day I need her to post my homeless kayak guide will work for food announcement.

Here it is: (and don’t tell number 3 we were talking nice about her. Being nice to each other is strictly forbidden in our family!)

SPAY IT FORWARD!!!

Here’s how it works:

You purchase a Spay It Forward card (hereby referred to as SIF) for $35. You can choose to either personally give the card to someone you know who qualifies for the SPOT Clinic services (total family income less than $35K), or you donate the card to the clinic to use for a client as needed. The SIF card entitles the qualifying recipient to a dog or cat spay or neuter, vaccinations, Frontline, and dewormer at the SPOT Clinic.

The regular SPOT prices of $25 and $35 can really be a hardship for some of our clients, but they love their pets as much as you and I do. When the choice is to either put gas in the car to get to work that week, or have Fluffy neutered, Fluffy doesn’t stand a chance. We hear stories everyday that make us grateful for our fortunes in life – though they may not be much. At least once a day, a client tells us that they can’t keep the pet inside the air-conditioned house, because they don’t have any AC. Can you imagine?!? Some live in a bus, others in a tent, and the more fortunate ones have one room that they rent. Not one bedroom, but one room. Shared with a family and the family pets.

Why do these people have pets? Most of them have taken in a stray. Maybe they could relate to the living creature that wanted nothing more than a little food and love. When they can’t afford to have their stray spayed or neutered, then they end up with lots more mouths to feed.

We can help. You can help. For about the cost of your coffee addiction for a week, you can Spay It Forward for someone’s beloved pet. Your SIF may be the one and only time this pet gets any medical attention – and what could be more important than spaying and neutering?

For additional information about the SPOT Clinic or to make an online donation, visit our website at www.vawokc.org. Donations can also be mailed to: Volunteers for Animal Welfare P.O. Box 20061 Oklahoma City , OK 73156

Please specify that the donations are to Spay It Forward (and tell them OKC Kayak sent you), and whether you would like the card donated to the clinic or to hand out personally.

From the bottom of my heart and for everything you do, thank you!

- nancy

neuter recruiter

Yeah, Yeah, Dave has been slacking. Most of you have probably noticed that the website tattle-tales on me when I have not been regularly updating my blog. I guess this is a small price to pay for turning the website design and upkeep to a friend. Needless to say, we have been a might bit busy lately. Here is a quick update on the new shop:

The refurbishing of the building is taking shape nicely despite kayak camps, lessons, trips and all the other craziness we have going on this time of the year. Nearly sixty hours of pressure washing was needed to remove the peeling stucco from the front of the building. Two nights of sign painting until 4:30 in the a.m. got the outside looking a bit better, too. (We had to project the lettering on the building at night with our digital projector.)

A lot of our nice friends have been kind enough to donate time, equipment and materials to the shop. A special thanks to West Marine for donating many store fixtures. Dave and Barb Brinker spent part of their vacation trip hauling boats across the country for us (We appreciate this!). Delilah Smith helped dumpster dive (watch for the blog about this coming soon!) And, thank you to Tom and Doris Stone for lots more fixtures, desks, a computer server, and a printer which Tom even came out and installed. I guess I will have to start being nicer to them. On that note, we are trying to do as much with recycled materials as possible. (Hint…. if you have building materials, store fixtures, an old microwave, etc., let’s talk.)

For the most part we have the store staffed from 10-6 Tuesday through Saturday and after hours by appointment. Expect to meet our new coworkers on the website real soon. In the meantime, again thank you to all those that continue to bless my life with your continued friendship and support. Regards, Dave Lindo

I had just wrapped up my on camera interview with the producer when my older (and most helpful) brother informed me that I had some broccoli in my teeth. Next, I was thinking he was going to tell me that my zipper was down or something, despite the fact that my swimsuit does not have any zippers. That is my family for you! We are a bunch of sarcastic antagonists with a somewhat dry sense of humor. Luckily, I was able to explain away my brother’s lack of tact by informing the producer that he was adopted. We got him from the rescue shelter back when they had the free spay/neuter special. (Good thing it was free, because Paul is working on kid number three.)

Speaking of families, the gal from Discover Oklahoma brought her own crew along. Her husband Kurt was the cameraman and her two daughters Prairie Kay and Cricket came out as well. She also brought out her friend John, who happened to lack the ability to use any of his body from the waist down.

I too would have a guest of my own tonight, Miss Peanut Jones. Peanut, as you faithful readers may remember, is our nearly 102 year old kayaker from Mustang Oklahoma (See blog entitled: Kayak Guide Sprinkles Ants on Cotton Candy Booth). Needless to say, Peanut was as excited as we were to be out in front of the camera. I must say, she got a little ahead of herself with the whole fame thing, as she showed up with new spinners on the wheels of her ‘82 Dodge Toronado, Grillz for her teeth, and a propeller atop her ballcap. You go Peanut!

Peanut was the first one to be interviewed since we only were able to get the judge to grant us a brief window of time as an exception to her house arrest. (Not really!) Let me be the first to say that some of Peanut’s responses to the interviewer’s questions quite surprised me. For example, when asked about why she wanted to be out for this events she said, “My doctor says that I need to gain some weight, and I had always heard that the camera adds twenty pounds.” What!!!! Then Peanut fessed up to the fact that she never had actually kayaked before, short of sitting in one in an asphalt parking lot. Thanks a lot Peanut, and I thought we had fooled her due to her cataracts on her eyes. “Well Peanut, you are going to get in a kayak today, aren’t you?” the producer queried. “Oh, no,” her immediate reply. It would take a promise of three cans of Ensure Plus, a bottle of number nine purple hair dye, two bowls of green bean and jello salad, and a new shuffleboard table to bribe this old gal to get in a boat with me. Even my brother Paul has an easier time getting a woman to go out on a date with him. She finally reluctantly agreed, so I responded in kind by returning her SAS shoes and walker that I had hidden from her.

We put Peanut in a tandem boat with me. Peanut would paddle in front, the driver’s seat. We kayaked all around, Peanut’s Grillz blinding the cameraman every time she smiled. I offered up a compliment to Peanut for the great job she was doing. She then accused me of doing all the work. Well, I can fix that. Yes Ma’am. Unbenounced to her, I honestly quit paddling all together. She was none-the-wiser because she was facing forward with her back to me. I held my finger to my lips, indicating to the laughing bystanders that they were not to tell. SHHHHHH!!!!!! Finally she asked if I was helping, to which I indicated that I was, while still laying on my back with the paddle behind my head. Peanut and I made it back to shore alive, but boy was she pooped. We sent her on her way after having her sign an addendum to the waiver promising that she would not turn us in to the nearest ombudsman.

John would be the next person to be subject to my antics. We outfitted his boat with some additional padding, and foam supports and pushed him off. His anxious wife asked how long we would be out on the water. “Thirty minutes,” I replied. As it turned out, John was on the water for nearly three hours. As he explained in his interview afterward, for the first time in a long time, he felt just like everyone else with his newfound mobility, absent the wheelchair or any other obvious signs of his disability. What an amazing experience it was to see this man’s happiness and excitement over the opportunities the kayak provided him.

The producer’s youngest daughter (5 years old) was our next solo boater of the evening. Unbelievably, she paddled around and steered the boat like she had done this her entire life. Mom and dad enjoyed the boat equally well.

Now, lest you think that I am going to give away the whole story. Watch for yourself on Saturday, July 12th on CBS in Oklahoma City or your local Discover Oklahoma station statewide.

Many thanks to Discover Oklahoma, producer Shel Wagner, cameraman Kurt Wagner, kiddos, Prairie Kay and Cricket, John and Charla Enns (sp?), Peanut Jones and her handlers, the Enteshary Family, as well as the entire OKC Kayak Family that came out to participate. Meanwhile, I am off to find out where Peanut bought her hat with the propeller on it.

A serious post for a change (a little off topic):

I own a television or two, yet rarely turn the thing on.  Probably because at last check there was a mountain of kayaks stacked in front of it, preventing me from viewing it or much less getting close enough to turn it on.  On the rare instance that I do watch television, it is usually to catch the ten p.m. newscast or to watch some sort of news documentary.  It would be fair to call me a news junkie, I suppose. 

Lately, I get most of my news through whatever headlining blip crosses the home page of my internet provider.  This week brought news of a death that I found to be quite unbelievable and saddening,  NBC’s Meet the Press moderator, Tim Russert.  Quite frankly, I found this loss to be more tragic than most any big name person that has passed in recent years, including Princess Diana.

Time after time in this current election season, I touted to my friends the case for someone like Mr. Russert to lead our great country.  He struck me as not only a compassionate and intelligent individual, but a fair and balanced man as well.  Fair and balanced, isn’t that what we need in this eclectic and diverse melting pot that we call our world?  Tim seemed unique if not unorthodox in the fact that never did he let on to any personal biases or beliefs, much less let this interfere with his work.  Can we all say the same for ourselves?  I know that I cannot always do this.  Imagine if we all were to try.  Imagine if for one week we all worked to understand and respect another’s viewpoint, even if it is not, and maybe never will be our own. 

I believe that Tim Russert rose to the top not because he possessed dashing looks, money, or any of the other qualities we often tend to idolize above the more important things like integrity and character.  He got there because he respected the fact that there was always more than one side to every story.  Why was Tim honored, respected, and remembered by politicians across party lines, religious icons, and the common man?  I believe that this is because he was fair, albeit tough, on his guests no matter Democrat or Republican, Catholic or agnostic, or whatever else. 

You never saw Tim pander to a guest for the sake of being politically correct, or to earn brownie points either.  Maybe myself and others can try to do a better job in this regard as well.  Maybe we will agree to disagree more often for the sake of friendships and fellowship and a more united community and world.  Maybe it is time we break from the norm and offer up acceptance, even when it might not be the popular opinion amongst our peers. 

Who knows, you as an individual might make a big difference in this world.  I know Tim did. 

Yesterday, the Sunday Oklahoman had an article about Oklahoma kayaking on the front page of the living section.  OKC Kayak was mentioned several times as were several “Deep Thoughts” by some guy named Lindo.  Check it out by going to this link:

http://www.newsok.com/article/3256694/

Shocking, I know! Many of my close friends and family were even surprised by the subject of this blog. “Dave, we did not even know that you were dating anyone,” they exclaim. But, yes, it is true, I am getting married. Today we made it official and signed the paperwork, and I am moving in this afternoon. This is not to be a marriage of conventional sorts though. “More gasps and rampant speculation!” No, I am not set to be engaged in matrimony at one of those “special ceremonies” currently only available in the state of California and a couple of other places, either. How many of you lost a bet on this one? These nuptials I speak of actually are not really such at all. I am getting married to a kayak shop. (Yeah, I certainly am not in this marriage for the money, huh?)

So, our exciting announcement that we have been teasing you with, is the opening of Oklahoma City’s only brick and mortar kayak shop. We officially closed on the nearly 5600 s.f. facility this afternoon, and are already relocating our inventory of hundreds of boats, loads of kayak accessories and gear to the new location.

Our new address is 220 N. Western Avenue, just west of the jail downtown (maybe I will get some orange OKC Kayak T-shirts printed up!) As always, we will have the best and largest selection of the top brands of kayaks and paddling accessories the industry has to offer, combined with the most knowledgeable experts on paddling in the entire state.

Some of the many brands we will continue to offer include Prijon, Necky, Old Town, Ocean Kayaks, Dagger, Perception, Mad River, Wilderness Systems, Wavesport, Wildwasser, Yakima, Harmony, Lendal, Werner, Extrasport, Kokatat, NRS, Carlisle, Seattle Sports, and many others.

Here is what you can expect in the coming weeks and months. During the transition period over the next few weeks, we will still be showing and selling boats and accessories by appointment as we relocate our inventory. The building itself needs a little cosmetic work, which will be taking place as time allows. (We don’t even have time to brush our teeth this time of the year.) New items and inventory arrive daily. We either stock or will shortly, anything and everything imaginable that relates to kayaking. If we don’t have it, we can get it within a day or two. But, believe me, have have hundreds of thousands of dollars of gear in stock. Other proposals for the new OKC Kayak Family Kayaking Center include a large indoor pool which will be perfect for off season parties and events, shuttle service from any of the downtown hotels for those out of town guest looking to do some kayaking, private kayak storage, guest visits and clinics from top kayak coaches and athletes, and more outings than ever before on the Oklahoma River (we are less than a mile away from the new Agnew boat ramp on the river). Like I said, we will be open for business in the meantime, but the official grand opening will likely be late summer or fall.

What you should know is this: OKC Kayak is your shop. This means feel free to offer your ideas and input for what you would like to see offered. We are growing, but our focus will still be on top notch, well qualified, customer service, as well as a relationship with our customers that goes far beyond the business transaction. The atmosphere you should still expect whether it is in the shop or on our outings and trips will continue to be one that is respectful and family friendly. That said, our customer service policy remains the same as well, “We promise to be honorable, and you promise to be reasonable.”

Lastly, OKC Kayak and the new shop are the end products of years of dreaming, goal setting, and hard work. I won’t pretend that this has come about without a great deal of sacrifice, but the satisfaction we get from our interactions with you make it more than worth it. Let me say how proud and honored I am to have each and every one of you as my friends. Without this invaluable support network, none of this would be possible.

To my coworkers, colleagues, and helper elves: You are not, “Like family,” you are family. I could not be doing this without you. THANK YOU! I am so grateful! Kevin and Jodi Wagner (the unpaid webmasters that really kicked this little gig up a notch), you are unbelievable friends, and I love you both. Jenn Kleck of Aqua Adventures, the training and advice I receive from you is invaluable, but having you as a role model and friend is priceless (We are still hiring!)

Stop in and see us (expect a little rough around the edges intially– think warehouse), or drop us a line. Better yet, stop in and see us, and drop us your wallet. Ha!!!

Abundantly grateful,

Dave (It is not a farmer’s tan) Lindo

Chief Boat Washer, Shuttle Driver, Owner, and Instructor

www.okckayak.com Ph: 405.830.9689 email: dave@okckayak.com 220 N. Western, OKC, OK 73106

Well, it is finally true. I am officially famous. For those of your who possess one of the few copies in circulation of my very own “Mail Order Husband Catalog,” I told you that it would be worth it to hang onto this until the day I made it big time. For the rest of you who don’t have a clue as to what I am speaking about, I totally deny ever creating a sixteen page, full color catalog of a “dozen or so, not so datable selections,” featuring no other than myself, in a sad attempt to court some girl.

I am certain that this latest attempt to destroy my impeccable reputation (Ha!) is just another one of these unethical and sad maneuvers to try and frame me. Now I know how the politicians must feel. What happened is, I put on a three hour kayak program for St. Mary’s School in Edmond. This end of the school year party was full of fun, and included an engaging kayak lesson with a highly qualified and skilled guide (and humble, too!) In addition to the hands-on instruction, we rotated over 40 kids into and out of kayaks on the school pond as they practiced what they had just learned. The parents, headmaster, teachers, and kids all loved it.

Boy, was I excited when a friend called to tell me that this event had made the Edmond Sun Newspaper. Yippee, FREE ADVERTISING!!! He sent it to me, and I was thrilled to see that it also included several nice color photos of the kids and myself in kayaks. But, wait just a second, the photo with the caption “Dave Lindo of OKC Kayak shows the kids how to paddle,” was a photo of me holding my paddle with my hands gripping it from the underside and the paddle turned around backwards.

Anyone know a good kayak instructor? (photo: Edmond Sun)

What!!!! I regularly chastise others for holding the paddle incorrectly, and here I was flat busted. Now the photographer could have used film to capture one of the nearly seventy thousand rolls that I performed (flawlessly, I might add). Or, she could have pictured the school group as they were captivated by my engaging lesson. ….but NOOOOO!!!!! Now, I am certain that this photo is in the same realm as bigfoot, Nessy, and ivory billed woodpeckers (look it up online). TOTALLY BOGUS!!!!

Anyway, as we all know, you can’t believe everything you see or read. And if you, by chance, do happen to have a fictitious copy of a Mail Order Husband Catalog featuring me, I am now offering even more money to retrieve these, and get them out of circulation. (I told you they would be worth something some day!)

Lastly, if you would like to read the article purely for its content go to: http://www.edmondsun.com/schools/local_story_147113806.html

Thank you, Patty Miller and the Edmond Sun for writing and running this story. We actually loved it, including the photos!